NQDESIGNS.X-TENSHI.COM
Home | About | FAQs | Contact | Terms | Credits | Linkage
PORTFOLIO RESOURCES DESIGNS TUTORIALS GOODIES
Murphy's Law
My 7th grade science teacher taught me a very important lesson. She introduced to me, as well as the rest of my 7th grade class, the concept of Murphy's Law, and I've been cursed ever since.


My history with Murphy's Law:
My 7th grade teacher used to to scare the baheejeez out of us. She was different from the rest of our teachers... very different. On the first day of school, she let us know that she wasn't going to put up with any of our crap. However, when it came to homework, she seemed strangely lenient with us... or so we thought. Everytime we had homework due, she wouldn't ask us to turn it in to her at her desk like a normal teacher would. Instead she called out our names in alphabetical order and asked each of us whether we did the homework or not. If you told her that you did the homework, then you were given 100% credit. But if you told her you didn't do the homework, then you were given 50% credit, which is still an "F" by the way. Now I was thinking, does she really expect us to tell her the truth? I'm so serious. This is how she graded homework - by asking us if we did it. She wouldn't even try to look over it. After she asked all of us if we did the homework, we would go over the answers. She would have each student answer one question, calling out our names in alphabetical order. Now, my teacher wasn't an idiot. You know what she told us? She said, "Don't even think about trying to lie when I ask you if you've done the work, because Murphy's Law states that when you students go around giving the answers, the question that you skipped will be the question you'll end up having to answer. If that happens, instead of getting a 50%, you'll get a 0%." Tsk, I wasn't scared. I mean, what were the chances...? Anyways our first homework assignment was really hard. I answered all the questions except one because I couldn't understand it at all. Of course the next day when she asked us if we did the homework, I said I did it because I did do it... so what if I skipped one question? Besides there was only like 8 questions on the homework, and with my last name, I was the 20th on the roster. So I figured I wasn't even going to be aswering any questions today. But that was if she started with Delaney Alberry. But instead, she started with Daniel Heins. And guess what question my name landed on? Let's just say I got a big fat "ZERO" on that assignment. How she did it? I don't know. And 5 other students got caught that day too! I swear on my mother's grave that this all true. After that day, we saw more and more kids "telling the truth" when our teacher asked for homework.

Now that you've read my history, catch up on the different versions of Murphy's Law, and fear it!
Murphy's Law states that...
  • If anything can go wrong, it will
  • If there is a possibility of several things going wrong, the one that will cause the most damage will be the one to go wrong
  • If anything just cannot go wrong, it will anyway
  • If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something
  • Mother nature is a bitch.
  • Matter will be damaged in direct proportion to its value
  • In nature, nothing is ever right. Therefore, if everything is going right ... something is wrong.
  • It is impossible to make anything foolproof because fools are so ingenious.
  • Everything takes longer than you think.
  • Everything takes longer than it takes.
  • The chance of the buttered side of the bread falling face down is directly proportional to the cost of the carpet.
  • A falling object will always land where it can do the most damage.
  • A shatterproof object will always fall on the only surface hard enough to crack or break it.
  • A paint drip will always find the hole in the newspaper and land on the carpet underneath (and will not be discovered until it has dried)
  • A dropped power tool will always land on the concrete instead of the soft ground (if outdoors) or the carpet (if indoors) - unless it is running, in which case it will fall on something it can damage (like your foot)
  • The greater the value of the rug, the greater the probability that the cat will throw up on it.
  • You will always find something in the last place you look.
  • If your looking for more than one thing, you'll find the most important one last.
  • It is never in the last place you look. It is in the first place you look, but never discovered on the first attempt.
  • After you bought a replacement for something you've lost and searched for everywhere, you'll find the original.
  • No matter how long or how hard you shop for an item, after you've bought it, it will be on sale somewhere cheaper. (SO TRUE!)
  • The other line always moves faster.
  • In order to get a loan, you must first prove you don't need it.
  • If it jams - force it. If it breaks, it needed replacing anyway.
  • Everyone has a scheme for getting rich that will not work.
  • There's never time to do it right, but there's always time to do it over.
  • Anything good in life is either illegal, immoral or fattening.
  • No good deed goes unpunished.
  • Anything dropped in the bathroom will fall in the toilet.
  • If you want something bad enough, chances are you won't get it.
  • If you think you are doing the right thing, chances are it will back-fire in your face.
  • Just when you think things cannot get any worse, they will.
  • Your best golf shots always occur when playing alone.
  • The worst golf shots always occur when playing with someone you are trying to impress.
  • The cost of the hair do is directly related to the strength of the wind
  • When you see light at the end of the tunnel, the tunnel will cave in.
  • The light at the end of the tunnel is a train
  • Being dead right, won't make you any less dead.
  • Whatever you want, you can't have, what you can have, you don't want.
  • Traffic is inversely proportional to how late you are, or are going to be.
  • The probability of being observed is in direct proportion to the stupidity of ones actions
  • Any thing that can go wrong, HAS Already Gone Wrong! You just haven't been notified.
  • If anything can go wrong, it will happen to the crankiest person
  • You will never find any more loose change than you have already lost.
  • Ants will always infest the nearest food cupboard.
  • The mud that won't come off on the doormat immediately adheres to the carpet.
  • When you wear new shoes for the first time, everyone will step on them.
  • When something goes wrong, you cannot find the solution in the instruction booklet, but someone else always does.
  • You will find an easy way to do it, after you've finished doing it.
  • No matter how perfect things are made to appear, Murphy's law will take effect and screw it up.
  • A knowledge of Murphy's Law is no help in any situation.

FAMOUS LAST WORDS
Smile . . . tomorrow will be worse.
August 14 2008: One New Affiliate: Please welcome Flamboyant!
August 12 2008: Added 2 New Manga Samples : 1) Lovely Complex and 2) Hana Kimi
4 New CSS Templates

New Iframe Layout

New Div Layout

free polls What do you want to see more of at NQD?
Tutorials!
Music! More music dammit!
Bring back the Neopets stuff!
Just Nika's beautiful presence is enough for me. =)
Web templates. Those are pretty neat.
Transparent PNGs!

Valid HTML 4.01 Strict Valid CSS


eXTReMe Tracker

Users Online
AFFILIATES
Layout and Content © Nika of NQ Designs// All Rights Reserved